Hits home for me

Fear and pain ( what is to come ?)

Today I write because I don't know what else to do. I guess I also don't want to forget how I feel. Monday I found out that I was not pregnant from a 3rd try of IN-VETRO, and it being my 6th loss. It is weird because I thought that Ryan and I had been through enough. I guess I was wrong. I know that we will get through this. But I know it will take time, asking WHY about 1000 more times, tears, pain, and a list of many more things. I am not sure what is to come for Ryan and I or when. The thing that I do know is. I love my family (Ryan and Aurora )we have each other. Along with our extended families. I personaly know how blessed I am to be a daughter, sister, wife, aunt, and a friend. Parts of me feel like life is over. I know that it is not. I can win in the end. Gall life is weird and hard but I guess the weird or hard times is what allows us to be happy all of the other times in life. Looking for an answer is what I am waiting for right now. When I get it I don't know. But some day it will come. I can't thank everyone enough for all of the love and support that we have been given over the past few years. I love all of you Thanks

My Brother inlaw

So last year when I had a hard time my sister hart attacked my house and there were a bunch of quotes on them. One of them really stood out and I have been inspired from it so I thought I should share it when all of you out there. This was written by Jeff Gregerson.


Sometimes life is tougher then a pile of bricks my only advice is this...... Turn to our Elder Brother because as a Master Craftsman he can grind the toughest bricks into the softest ,silkiest sand that lay on the warm beaches of our near horizon.
Thanks Jeff I love you and thanks for such comforting words.